


exclusive

by kozumekenmas



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Andrew is a bitch, M/M, Makeouts, Verbal Consent, angsty and then soft, but nothing more than makeouts, kinda soft, nicky is a hoe as always, references to past abuse, roland is mentioned lmao, so is neil though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-01-27 06:20:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21387511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kozumekenmas/pseuds/kozumekenmas
Summary: Neil doesn't say anything, but his cheeks pink further. Nicky's eyes widen, and his jaw drops. "Oh my God, Neil, who is it? Is it someone we know? Is it a guy or a girl?""Shut up, Nicky, it's no one," Neil says, but Andrew can see that Neil's deliberately avoiding his gaze.Oh.-In which Andrew thinks Neil is cheating on him, but cheating doesn’t really exist in a non-exclusive relationship... right?
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Comments: 12
Kudos: 673





	exclusive

**Author's Note:**

> i literally wrote this bc i was craving andreil content & decided to make some for myself. i tried to make this as non-cringy & intimate as i could muster, but i don’t know how good it turned out. i am self-betaed & exhausted as always.

"C'mon, Neil, it'll be fun," Nicky is saying, slouching against a wall at Neil's side.

Andrew surveys the scene as he walks soundlessly into the room; Neil is wearing a large gray hoodie with the Foxes' paw on his chest in orange. Andrew thinks his constant displays of alleged "team spirit" are lame and sickening, but the hoodie looks warm, especially on a cool day like this one.

Andrew hadn't anticipated the low temperature, and he'd chosen a plain black t-shirt with this usual armbands. When he gets to the Court, the chilly air that usually fills the space takes him slightly by surprise, and leaves him shivering the faintest bit.

Whatever.

"I don't know," Neil replies, sighing. He sits against the wall, his knees up, and his head resting on his knuckles. "I have a lot of homework."

"Don't we all," Nicky snorts. "This is college. It's bound to be a little more strenuous than High School Musical. You have to get out, live a little. Homework can wait til Sunday."

"Teaching time management, Nicky? I hadn't pegged you for the advisory type," Andrew says blandly, leaning his outstretched arm against the wall.

Neil and Nicky turn to look at him, the latter's face lighting up. "Andrew! Andrew, Andrew, listen, man," he says, shaking his head. "Neil says he can't come to Columbia this week, 'cause he's too busy with work."

Andrew shoots Neil a cold glance. "What homework do you have, Neil?"

"Um, Spanish and math?" Neil says, the end of his voice going up as if it's a question he was asking.

"Liar," Andrew says mildly.

"Ooh, what? Andrew's got the dirt on Neil?" Nicky laughs from Neil's side. Neil, at his feet, looks much dismayed, compared to Nicky's elation.

Andrew doesn't miss the light pinking of Neil's cheeks, and feels a pang in his stomach seeing the way Neil's blue eyes search his face, looking for some explanation for a truth Andrew theoretically has no way of knowing.

"Dan," Andrew says, not offering a better explanation. He trusts that both Nicky and Neil have at least as much brain power as it takes to decode that statement.

Dan had apparently dropped by Matt's and Neil's place the previous night to speak with Matt, and was complaining at practice about how seriously Neil took things. "He was up til two so he could finish his Spanish homework," Dan had huffed. "Did he?" Renee'd asked. "Yup. And his English, too. Moron," was Dan's reply.

Neil mouths damn and bites down on his bottom lip in a way that makes Andrew want to do it for him.

"That's rough, Neil," Nicky smirks. "Now you don't have any excuse not to come with us."

"I still can't," Neil insists, shaking his head.

"Why, Neil? What's more important?" Andrew asks, keeping his tone apathetic, but silently wondering. "It's not Exy practice. Kevin's coming with us."

"It's not Exy practice," Neil agrees simply, not bothering to elaborate.

"Oh my God—has the man who feels no attraction found someone who he would fuck?" Nicky asks, looking inhumanly excited. Though Andrew is sure that Nicky's statement is utter bullshit, given what Andrew and Neil have been up to for the last week or so, the thought sends angry tremors through Andrew's brain.

Silently, Andrew turns his gaze to Neil for a reaction, keeping his own expression utterly blank.

Neil doesn't say anything, but his cheeks pink further. Nicky's eyes widen, and his jaw drops. "Oh my God, Neil, who is it? Is it someone we know? Is it a guy or a girl?"

"Shut up, Nicky, it's no one," Neil says, but Andrew can see that Neil's deliberately avoiding his gaze.

Oh.

"Is it a guy or a girl!" Nicky chants, practically jumping up and down in glee as Neil's face reddens substantially.

This isn't a thing.

I hate you.

You are a pipe dream.

This is nothing.

It's okay, Andrew supposes. Neil's not violating anything, is he? They're not... they're not exclusive. It's not like they're doing anything more than making out when they have free time.

Why shouldn't Neil be able to do the same thing—and possibly more—with someone else? Someone who will actually let him touch them?

The last bit sticks with Andrew, and in order to ignore the bite of it, he internalizes it. Saves it for later. Stores it for another time, when he'll need it.

"Fine, fine, fine. What do they look like?" Nicky asks, only a few feet away from Andrew. In Andrew's state, though, it feels like miles.

Andrew breaks his blank stare from the Court wall and looks back at Neil, who's looking at Nicky instead.

"I don't know," Neil mumbles.

"Jesus, Neil, give me a hair color or something," Nicky says, exasperated.

"Leave it, Nicky, really," Neil insists, shaking his head emphatically. Neil's cleat blue eyes slide to the side, though, and fill with a faraway look nevertheless.

Andrew wants to throw up. All those times he said that Neil and him, what they have, what they are doing, doesn't matter. Maybe that's why.

"If you guys are just going to stand around, gossiping, like teenage girls, I'll be leaving," Andrew says, trying his very best to keep his voice from getting hoarse, and turning on his heel.

"Okay, Debby Downer," Nicky calls.

Neil doesn't say anything.

-

Walking out onto the sidewalk, Andrew can hear his own heartbeat in his ears. What the fuck. Fuck you, Neil. Fuck you, Neil Josten.

He unlocks his car, pulls the door open, slides inside in a fluid motion. Only once he has turned the key into the ignition does Andrew allow himself a moment of breaking down.

He lays his head on the steering wheel, and fails to set off the horn like all those characters in TV movies. That is a plus, Andrew supposes, a bleak laugh among the myriad of ragged thoughts spiraling through his head.

"What the fuck, Neil Josten," Andrew whispers to himself, shutting his eyes tight. "Why did I let you do this."

A knock. A knock interrupts the downward stream of angry, sad, pathetic, hateful thoughts that flow through the crevices of Andrew's brain. Andrew barely lifts his head.

What the fuck is happening now, Andrew wonders offhandedly as he turns to look at the passenger seat's window.

Blue eyes pierce his. Of-fucking-course. Neil Josten.

Wordlessly, Andrew reaches over and unlocks the door Neil is standing next to.

Wordlessly, Neil opens it and slides inside, closing the door behind him.

Andrew doesn't speak, and neither does Neil, though the latter opens his mouth a couple of times. Nothing manages to come out, however, bathing them both in a choking silence.

Finally, Neil turns to face Andrew. Andrew keeps looking straight ahead, not letting his expression betray any of his ragged emotions.

"Remember what I said?" Neil asks quietly.

Remember what you said, when? I remember everything you've ever said to me, Neil Josten. I'm sure this random sentiment is no different, thinks Andrew. He doesn't say it, though, as he is not quite yet suicidal.

"No," he settles for instead, grimly pleased when his voice doesn't shake or crack, maintaining the apathy Andrew wears on his face.

Neil inhales. Exhales. It's quiet enough in the car that Andrew can hear every hitch of his breath.

Idly, Andrew misses a memory that shouldn't even be far enough away to miss. He misses Neil's hands threaded through his hair, lips on his lips, breath on his neck, voice in his ears, taste on his tongue.

"You remember, Andrew," Neil murmurs.

Of course I do, Andrew thinks but doesn't say.

"What," Andrew presses blandly.

"Only you. Of everyone, only you," Neil says, slowly, and Andrew feels every single tower and wall and block he's built inside himself collapse at those four words that Neil repeats.

"Not Nicky. Not Allison or Matt or Dan or Renee or Aaron or Kevin. You," Neil says. When Andrew dares to tear his iron gaze from the street in front of him, Neil is still staring at him.

"I hate you," Andrew says.

"I know," Neil replies, lifting a hand and stopping it just shy of Andrew's face. "Yes or no?"

"No," Andrew says, after a moment, surprising even himself. Neil nods, retracting his arm and dropping it into his lap. That action makes everything inside Andrew ignite.

Because no one before Neil ever had the sense to do that. And do it without looking wounded and pitiful, like Andrew had hurt them by telling them not to touch him.

Not Drake, not Keely, not Henry or Nolan. Not even Roland, half of the time.

"Can we go back to the dorms?" Neil asks.

Andrew doesn't say anything. He just pulls out of the parking spot and takes them home.

-

The pair of them step out into the parking lot and Andrew locks his car behind them, pocketing the keys and following Neil into the dorms. Neil walks towards his room, and against his better judgement, Andrew deigns to follow.

Neil only notices Andrew's added presence as he pushes open the door, and Andrew slips in before him. Neil's eyes widen, but he doesn't say anything, and Andrew is glad of it.

Andrew settles on the couch in front of the TV, though he doesn't turn it on. After a moment, Neil joins him, keeping a comfortable distance between them on the worn cushions. Once again, Andrew thinks about how he has never kissed anyone like Neil, who has been willing to let Andrew feel comfortable, despite what he wants.

The thought warms him uncomfortable, he likes it almost too much, and Andrew sort of doesn't know how to feel about it.

Abruptly, Andrew turns to Neil, leans across the cushions and reaches out to cup Neil's chin. He pulls Neil towards him, and asks, "Yes or no?"

"No."

This time, Andrew is confused. He looks into Neil's blue eyes, a question in his own hazel ones, and let's Neil's chin go, leaning back. He'll respect it, sure, but that doesn't mean Andrew understands why, when Neil was about to kiss him just a few minutes ago.

"We need to talk, first," Neil says. That surprises Andrew, who turns back to Neil, his expression annoyed. He doesn't want to talk. He wants to crush Neil beneath his weight, hear his name hissed out in Neil's voice.

"What," Andrew says simply.

"I told you what I had to say. Now you tell me," Neil replies, crossing his arms.

“Shut up” bubbles to the top of Andrew's consciousness, and he wants to tell Neil to, or even make him. But Andrew, like Neil, understands a no, and stands down. He doesn't make a move to speak, though.

"Alright, then," Neil shrugs, standing. "I guess I'll go for a run, then."

"No," Andrew huffs, glaring at Neil, and repeating the day's most popular word.

Neil sits back down.

"I assumed Nicky was right," Andrew starts after a moment. Neil opens his mouth, but Andrew glares at him, as if to say, you wanted me to talk, so let me talk. Neil shuts up.

"I thought you were... whatever. With someone who lets you actually touch them. I don't know." Andrew actually sounds unsure of himself, which he hates, but Neil looks like he's actually listening to what Andrew has to say, so he can't help but keep going.

"I know you don't swing. But you and me did... something. So it could technically happen again. I was not angry." Andrew finishes his statement off with a lie, and nods at Neil once to show that he can speak.

q

"You weren't?" Neil asks, sounding skeptical.

Andrew simply stares at him.

"Because it's fine, if you were. Fine with me. I wouldn't—I wouldn't do that, you know. I said it already. It's only you. I know you hate that. It's true, though," Neil says.

Andrew nods, like he doesn't care, but Neil's words envelop him like a blanket that he wants to stay under for eternity. It's only you. Andrew wants to hear Neil say that, over and over and over and over.

"Okay?"

Andrew nods again. This time, he goes slow when he reaches for Neil, and Neil leans toward him, meeting him in the middle. Holding onto Neil's jaw, Andrew asks the cursory question. "Yes or no?"

"Yes," Neil says, and the answer is half-swallowed by Andrew's mouth on his.

It's slow at first, both of them leaning and breathing into each other, Andrew so hot and Neil so cold, even in his big hoodie. Neil's hands stay at his sides, though when Andrew pulls back for a moment, he can see with satisfaction that they're gripped, white-knuckled, in the folds of the couch.

Andrew closes his fingers around Neil's wrists and pulls his hands up to his shoulders and places them there, like they're ballroom dancing. "Here, up," Andrew says, not waiting to see what Neil will do before he fists his hands in Neil's hoodie and pulls him back.

This time, it's different, harder and heavier and deeper as Andrew pushes Neil back against the back of the couch, and then—the phone rings.

Not Neil's cell phone, but the room's landline. The way Neil groans makes something icy and good unfurl inside Andrew, but when Neil goes to get the phone, Andrew lets him go, though begrudgingly.

"Hello?" Neil asks, not able to keep the annoyance completely out of his voice, making Andrew want to shove him to the floor. Still, Andrew holds still when Neil says, "Nicky?"

Curious, Andrew looks over to where Neil stands. "I got it. Okay, fine. God, fine. Okay. Yes, I'm good. Can we talk later? Yes. Bye. Okay. Bye, Nicky." Neil says, ending the call and immediately shoving the phone back into its cradle.

Andrew raises his eyebrows as Neil walks back to the couch. "What did Nicky want?" Andrew asks, rather than tackling Neil again. Andrew can tell from Neil's sigh that that's what Neil wants, too, but he doesn't do it just yet.

"Wanted to force me to come to Columbia. I said yes," Neil shrugged.

"Why didn't you want to come in the first place?" Andrew asks, though he couldn't possibly care. All he wants is two inches away from him, fidgeting and sighing, practically offering himself up to Andrew like a meal.

"I don't know," Neil says, looking slightly exasperated. Andrew cannot believe how great this is.

"You don't know?" Andrew asks, inching closer to Neil, bowing his head so Neil can feel his breath on his shoulder. Andrew doesn't miss the slight shiver that passes over Neil, and he allows himself the ghost of a smile, out of sight from Neil.

"I don't know," Neil repeats, somewhat shakily.

"That's strange," Andrew says, picking his head up and staring into Neil's wide blue eyes. "Especially because you were so intent on not going just before."

Neil seems at a loss for words, too distracted. "Yes or no?" Andrew asks blandly, hooking his fingers around the hem of Neil's hoodie.

"Yes," Neil says, drawing it out like a prayer. Andrew is absolutely sure that he hates this boy, so sure of it as he slips his hand under the edge of Neil's hoodie, and presses his palm flat to Neil's torso.

With his other hand, he threads his fingers through Neil's hair and pulls him into another kiss, this one fast like the other, panting and desperate on Neil's end, and achingly so by Andrew.

Andrew savors it; rarely does Neil get like this. He's always calm and collected, treating their physical contact like something he enjoys but considers good, like how one might speak about that new pizza place.

They stay like that for awhile, until Neil pulls back the slightest, moving his hands from Andrew's shoulders to his chin. He pulls Andrew into him, but arches his head lower, reaching to Andrew's neck.

Andrew sucks in a breath. Neil's neck thing is abnormal if not weird—the other people Andrew has consensually been with had mostly left his neck alone—but Andrew likes it so much that it's almost obsessive. He will never admit it, but when Andrew lays awake thinking of Neil, he'll press his fingers lightly to his neck.

Now Neil leans into his neck, and the chill sends shivers up Andrew's spine. Andrew shudders into Neil, and he makes a low sound that just makes Neil do it again and again. He sinks his teeth in, not enough to hurt, but enough for Andrew to feel it, and Andrew bites out "Neil."

It's embarrassing, really, and it doesn't help that Neil just keeps making Andrew want to do it again. Digging his hands into Neil's scalp and his waist, Andrew shivers again. If Neil does this any more, Andrew is going to say something ridiculous.

"You're going to leave a mark," Andrew grits out. He feels Neil pull back, and exhales like maybe he's talked sense into him. Andrew isn't sure if he's feeling relief or disappointment, though.

"So?" Neil asks, catching Andrew by surprise. "No one will mind."

That makes Andrew shiver more than anything, and with that, he uses both hands to push Neil down. Andrew pins him down and smashes their mouths together hard, and messily.

Andrew's fingers dig into Neil's hips and Neil makes a sound again that makes Andrew push him down harder, until Neil leans back up to press a kiss to Andrew's collarbone. A shiver wracks Andrew's frame as Neil sits up beneath him, forcing him up, too.

"Say it again?" Andrew requests, a question rather than a demand.

"Say what?" Neil asks, pushing his hair out of his eyes. Andrew reaches forward and does it for him.

"What you said before," Andrew hisses, glaring at Neil, knowing that all he's doing is betraying how utterly different his emotions are from his expression. Neil recognizes this, too, with a grin.

"Only you, Andrew," Neil says, as Andrew pushes back onto him. "I only want you."

-

(In the end, Neil hadn't wanted to go to Columbia because he didn't want to see Roland flirt with Andrew like he tended to do.)

(Andrew remedies this by telling Roland to fuck off or face the wrath of his hidden knives.)

(Roland complies, naturally.)

(Then, once they're sure Nicky, Kevin and Aaron are out of sight, Andrew pushes Neil against the wall next to the bar.)

(People get the message.)

(And so, despite what Andrew Minyard might say, they are exclusive.)


End file.
